Identity

As a family girl and a homebody, my family members are a big influence in my life and the reason I am the person I have become. However, I have to say that my friends, especially family friends, are also a huge part of my developed identity. Therefore, my mom, grand mom, and family friend, Sister Angela has each contributed to the love, self-esteem, and faith I acquire today. Unfortunately, not every girl’s mom is her best friend, but for me, my mom is. For as long as I can remember, my mom has taught be about caring and loving for others. However, she didn’t actually give straightforward lessons on the definition of love. Instead, she let her actions teach me. My mom is the type of woman that runs around the house doing everything and anything possible for my siblings and I. From giving us goodnight kisses to washing our clothes (even when she didn’t feel like it). For the longest time I believed that was pure love—doing things for others even when you hated doing it. Although one day when my mom was complaining about all the laundry she had to do, I asked her why she does it if makes her miserable? I expected an answer like “well no one else is going to do it,” but she responded saying, “I may hate doing the laundry, but I’d be miserable if I didn’t have your laundry to do.” From that day on, I realized that pure love comes from the graces you have, even if it means doing some extra laundry.

All of my family members are like my personal cheer team, but I have to say the one person who is the head of the cheer team is my grand mom. She never fails to make me feel good about myself. Whenever I’m feeling low, I know that I can call my grand mom for support and a confidence boost. I recently called her to talk to her about how hard it is to wait to hear from colleges. As I wait for my top choice to tell me whether or not I’ve been accepted, I worry that I’m going to get rejected. When I told my grand mom about my anxiety, she simply told me that I’ve done my best and if this college really doesn’t want me then it’s their loss. I’m not sure why, but just hearing this from my grand mom always makes me feel better. Even though it was only a small comment, I think that I feel better because of all the small comments that have boosted my confidence over the years from her. Because of my grand mom, I have acquired the self-esteem that I have today and will continue to carry with me for the rest of my life.

“Pray, God will listen” is a saying I would hear for two weeks during the month of August when our family friend, Sister Angela Joseph would come down the shore. For years I would complain to her about my most recent issues, which were primarily school related since August was the countdown month to the first day of school. I particularly remember the summer before freshman year, and the anxiety I felt. I sat on the beach with Sister, and vented about all my worries and fears of the first day of freshman year. In hindsight, all my fears were silly, but at the time I remember saying “I’m never going to make any friends.” When I said that, Sister Angela turned to me and said, “Oh don’t be ridiculous, there’s nothing to be nervous about, just pray and God will listen.” For years, she would preach to me about God and slip in little faith lessons wherever she could. The lessons landed mostly between the time we would go to the beach and shop at the Atlantic City Outlets. My strong faith and development in prayer would never be the way they are today if it wasn’t for the lessons that Sister Angela taught me. http://www.pray-as-you-go.org/home/